Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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