did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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