You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
