Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize
