This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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