I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
