rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
The air was thick with penises
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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