drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Randomize
