that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
