dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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