And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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