Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
