so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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