She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Someone shit on the floor
they need to just BURY HIM!
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
