So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
My life is pants optional.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize