No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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