This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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