It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
