what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
