well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
