but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
