Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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