did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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