what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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