we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
