My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
