So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
