I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
