People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
