What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
