Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
If I had your ass I would rule the world
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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