...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
