You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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