she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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