11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
