Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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