i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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