i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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