I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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