she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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