Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
