Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
