when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
