420 ftw
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
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