So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
