I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
