great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
