For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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