It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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