I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
