i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
