now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Also, beer. Big fan.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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