im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
